Today I am feeling
very grateful because I am remembering where I was exactly one year ago at this
very minute. I was sitting in the hotel room in New York City getting ready to
appear on the TODAY show to share my story with the world. My, how my life has
changed since then. Last year at this time, this Facebook group had
approximately 30 members; today it is just a few shy of 1300. Last year at this
time, only a handful of friends, colleagues, and family members knew about my
miracle; today the story has circled the globe multiple times. Last year at
this time, I was just a small-town, naïve girl who had been blessed with a
miracle and wondering what on earth I was supposed to do with it; Today, well
today….. I am still that girl…. Still wondering what God wants of me…..still
searching for answers…..still fighting the fight to become a better, kinder,
gentler person!
So much has changed….and
yet so much has stayed the same. Ever the same is GOD….He was, is, and always will
be so good…so faithful….so present. To Him be all Glory. Today, as I reflect on that day in NYC, I renew
my commitment to this journey…and to all of you….that I will be here to
support, encourage, and help you, much in the same way that you are here for
me. God has brought us together….the
TODAY show, the other media stuff and interviews, the blog….all this stuff….was
simply the tool that God used to connect us.
Don’t doubt that you are here for a reason. Don’t lose hope that you,
too, are a miracle. Don’t give up on your dream. WE can do it….together!
For those that are new to this group, below is my journal entry for last year at this time, written before my television appearance. I thought perhaps you’d like to share in my memories of this day. Make it a good day today, my friends!!!!
3-4-13
It’s here… the day has arrived, ready or not, here it is! It’s
5:30 am. I have been up already for two hours, enjoying the darkness and
stillness of my room while my sister sleeps. I’m not sure what I’m feeling…a
bit of apprehension, but not extreme stress….at least at this moment. That may
come later as the time approaches. I’ve already had two cups of coffee and have
been using this time to clear my mind of worry and just try to stay relaxed and
focus. I received a comforting text right from a dear friend right before I
drifted off to sleep and I think that it helped put me at ease. I’ve received
so many emails and posts on Facebook and I know that there are so many people
surrounding me with love, support, and mostly prayer. And after all… it’s only
about 4 minutes…its’ really not that big of a deal, right? I don’t know what will happen when I get to
the studio…all I know is that the producer is picking me up at the hotel at
9:10 to escort me over to the Studio, through security clearance, for hair and
make-up. I’ve not spoken to Joy Bauer or the hosts yet and I don’t know what
they will be asking me or what the format will be. I have already taped a
minute audio track telling a little about my story. This audio will be used as
part of a video slide show segment full of my most unbecoming “Fat
Pictures”. That clip has been the most
difficult for me to deal with. Knowing that in about 5 hours, pictures of me at
my absolute worst will be shown across the country and will end up
“permanently” out there on YouTube and the internet for the rest of my days has
made me completely vulnerable. No longer will this “past Theresa” be a secret
from those I meet. No longer will I be able to hide. No longer will my pain and
sadness be buried deep within my heart. It will be embarrassing, humbling, and
perhaps even a bit shameful for me to watch and to share with the world….and
yet…it is that THERESA….that has made THIS THERESA…who I am today. It is those
experiences…those losses, those moments of sadness and hurt…that have led me to
this day…to this tremendous opportunity. It is those experiences and images
that have helped to build character and strength, and will hopefully make me a
kinder, more compassionate soul. It is that THERESA that you chose to befriend
and love. It is that THERESA that lives
in this new THERESA.
SO…with that being said… I suppose the only thing I should be
feeling is complete, absolute gratitude…to GOD, and to you. If I can capture those feelings and that
gratitude, then I will be able to walk out on that set with confidence and
joy….internal joy…and Physical JOY…JOY BAUER.
Isn’t it ironic that my life is filled with deep down, bubbling over
kind of joy internally….and I am soon to be a part of the JOY FIT CLUB???? Coincidence???? I think not!!! My sincere hope…is that someone…somewhere…will
hear my story today, see it on the internet, read it in the paper, come across
it on FB…wherever….that one person….will find hope, courage, inspiration to
make a change in his/her life, and most importantly, I hope that God will be
glorified in and through this experience.
He has brought me to this moment…at this point…all I can do is surrender
this day to HIM and say…Here I am! Keep
the good thoughts and prayers coming. I’m going to need to be surrounded them. I’ll be catching a flight home later this
afternoon…once I get through the show, I can start getting mentally prepared
for the flight. THANK YOU!!!! I hope I don’t disappoint you! As that old cigarette commercial once said,
“You’ve come a long way, baby!” Thanks for being a part of the journey.
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