As promised...some photos from my trip

It's lunch time! I promised some of you that I would post some pictures from the weekend....so here you go. A couple of them were at Cox Arboretum in Dayton. It's been a standing tradition for 30 years now that my friend and I visit the park each time I go to Dayton. Even though it was a bit dreary and rainy, the park is just alive with God's glory as manifested in His creation.  I love it there!!!  

The wedding was beautiful, very much like the type of outdoor country wedding you see on TV. The setting was the groom's parent's property and the décor was full of flowers, hurricane lamps, and rustic country furnishings.....all surrounded up by a large corn field. The corn is certainly a lot higher in Ohio than it is in northern Michigan. They had a very large white tent with hanging chandeliers and at dark, there were sparklers and the launching of a whole bunch (not sure how many but a lot) of those hot air type balloon things. I have no idea what they are called, but it was so beautiful to see the dark sky....already lit up with stars....  full of those light up paper hot air type balloons sailing into the horizon. As the balloons were beginning to fill with the heat and rise into the sky, I said a silent prayer for all of you. I asked God to allow whatever burdens you; whatever weighs heavy on your mind; whatever holds you back; to just be lifted from your spirits and float away, so that each of you come to know the freedom, peace, joy, and mostly GRATITUDE  that I was feeling at that very moment.  I've said this before....you all are with me in thought, prayer, and spirit.....wherever I go!


It was such a great little trip.  I am so blessed.....and to think....Three years ago at this time there would have been NO WAY that I would have been able to enjoy a weekend like this.  It is great to have my life back!  And so I ask you....WHAT IS IT...that you would like to be able to do again?  Take a walk in the park?  Climb on the rocks in a waterfall?  Visit friends or family out of town?  Attend a wedding and not be afraid that the rented chairs would break?  Take a spin around the dance floor?   Use those things to motivate you to do what it necessary so that you can get your life back too!

Rain, rain go away

Good Morning..... I hope everyone is happy and well today.  I’m having a wonderful time thus far visiting my long-time friend, Joe Callahan, (gosh, has it really been 30+ years???) even though unexpected rain last night forced us to change the plan to attend a classic car show and concert in the park. However, my friend took me to see a hidden treasure in the midst of the city: a secluded grotto to Our Lady of Lourdes on the retreat center property of the Marianist Brothers. It was sprinkling, but getting a little damp was well worth the moment of seeing this beautiful wooded shine in the midst of gorgeous plants and flowers. Loved it! 

As we walked through the wooded trail, I couldn’t help but give thanks silently for the many blessings in my life, namely, the fact that I could even WALK down that path. The world is full of so many of these sights and experiences…..often taken for granted by others who do not know what it is like to be obese, addicted, disabled, depressed, sick, sad (whatever it is that hinders us and threatens to rob us of our joy and peace) and for so many years, I was unable to experience these types of moments.  Ironically, so many of these things existed around me…..and I never knew.  I often wonder….if I KNEW what life could be like, would I have done something sooner to get my life back?  Would I have tried sooner to lose weight; would I have sought counseling to deal with the grief of loss; would I have allowed myself to get to such a dark place? That is a question that I suppose I will never know the answer to.  Part of me says, YES, I always knew deep down that my weight was hindering me and I was CHOOSING not to do anything about it. I could not control those losses that I endured, but I could have dealt with them in a better way. It certainly is easier to deny my role and responsibility in my health and well-being and blame others and circumstances that happened to me, but another part of me believes whole-heartedly that all of this is in God’s time and that it was only when HE changed my mind-set and began to change my heart that this miracle could be set in motion. Obviously we have to cooperate with God, but before a miracle and change can be manifested in our bodies, we have to surrender our heart/mind/spirit so that God can transform our thoughts, which in turn will transform our bodies.

 If you are struggling in any way or having trouble ‘getting started’ or sticking to a plan, perhaps a prayer that God will change your heart and thoughts might be a better place to start than simply trying to revamp your entire eating plan; go cold turkey; or completely revamp your entire life. I’ve said this before, and it is a principle that I live by every day, “I believe, without a doubt that GOD CAN MOVE MOUNTAINS but we have to pick up the shovel and cooperate with Him.” It’s a partnership…..He has already done HIS part by dying on the cross; we have to do our part EVERY DAY by trying to be better people, treating others with kindness and compassion, making good choices for our minds, spirits, and bodies, and expressing GRATITUDE for all things….even the rain that alters our vacation plans. It is my daily prayer that God will change my heart and take over my life.

So….the rain cancelled last night’s plans….but the evening turned out to be pleasant anyway with great conversation, a lovely dinner in a quaint little diner, a drive through the country….AND… we stopped at a Goodwill store and I found my very first pair of Tommy Hilfiger jeans for $4.00!  Woot! Woot!  J  It’s raining and foggy again this morning so my plans to visit Cox Arboretum will likely be altered as well, but I’m sure the day will be wonderful anyway. I might just have to go garage saleing or shopping!  Hopefully, it will stop raining before the wedding this evening.

Make it a good day today….regardless of the weather….regardless of any disappointments that may come your way….regardless of whether someone lets you down today.  Choose to be happy and grateful…in spite of all things.  

A year of jubilee continues on

I am often asked, “Theresa, what is it that makes you keep going when you want to give up”?  Depending on the situation and my mood, the answer may vary because there are many things that keep me motivated. The most important, however, really has little to do with me personally, but rather, is fueled by a desire deep within me….a call if you will…to help others.  It may sound trite, but honestly, that is what energizes me and keeps me going when I am weary.  I’ve been thinking about this a lot in the past week because it today is my 51^st birthday and I’ve been a bit melancholy for several days in anticipation of this day.  I’m certainly not depressed about getting older; in fact, it’s just the opposite. I rejoice that I AM ALIVE to celebrate another birthday after so many years wondering how long it would be before someone found me dead.

As I’ve been reflecting on this day, it finally dawned on me that my ‘’out-of-sortness” (how’s that for making up my own words??) had nothing to do with age, but rather the ending of my YEAR OF JUBILEE. For those of you that are not familiar with the concept, biblically, the 50^th year is called a year of jubilee…a year of great favor from God; a year when prisoners were set free; debts cancelled; a year of great blessings.  Last year I was SO EXCITED to turn 50…and although there have been many wonderful days in my life, I think my 50^th birthday is on the top of the list. It was just an incredible day….and the beginning of a wonderful year; certainly one of GREAT FAVOR from the Lord!

This morning I have been reflecting on this past year…and I actually had tears of gratitude in my eyes as I sat in the darkness…because I have been so blessed. In the past year so many incredible things happened….things that I would never ever dreamed possible.  New experiences like riding a Harley, standing on the top of a dune with a dear friend, fly-fishing, getting my first smart phone AND high speed internet, appearing in magazines, radio, TV, sharing my story with literally hundreds of people all over the world, meeting new people and making new friends. The list could go on and on.  By far, it has been the best year of my life….thus far.  There have been ups and downs; I’ve grieved the sudden deaths of friends and loved ones; experienced triumphs and tragedies; had good days and bad; shed tears and laughed….you get it……and YET, through it all, I experienced a year of God’s Favor in a way that I’ve never known; nor could have ever imagined! It’s no wonder I’ve been a bit blue thinking about the ending of this year.  But…..as I prayed and reflected, I asked myself, “Does it really have to end?”  Hmmm…… I don’t think so!   

When my 50^th birthday arrived, I had the expectation that this was my YEAR OF JUBILEE…my year of blessings and favor.  Expectation…hmmm…  Because God said it, I believed it…and expected it…and looked for it….and expressed gratitude for it….and connected EVERYTHING…..good and bad…that happened to me this past year to my year of favor. My mindset was completely different this whole year and even though I am moody and emotional and struggle just like the rest of the world, it always came back to the mindset that “This is my year of favor”….that everything that happens, every person I speak to, every opportunity that comes my way……is part of God’s plan for me, even if I don’t fully understand what that plan might be. I just knew…and know….that all the pieces will come together in due time.  Why?  Because it was my Year of Jubilee, of course….and because I sincerely believe that the whole purpose that God blessed me with this miracle…this new life…. is reflected in the following scripture from Isaiah 61. 

The Year of the Lord's Favor
1The Spirit of the Lord GOD is upon me, Because the LORD has anointed me To bring good news to the afflicted; He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, To proclaim liberty to captives And freedom to prisoners; 2To proclaim the favorable year of the LORD And the day of vengeance of our God; To comfort all who mourn, 3To grant those who mourn in Zion, Giving them a garland instead of ashes, The oil of gladness instead of mourning, The mantle of praise instead of a spirit of fainting. So they will be called oaks of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that He may be glorified.…

How else can I explain how/why this story keeps circulating the globe…over and over….and has now appeared on multiple continents and has been translated into languages I’ve never even heard?  I can’t explain it…. I simply have to be grateful….and willing….and open….and trust. It’s the same expectation and belief I had when I started this journey a few years ago. I believed…that I could do it with God’s help….and when I wanted to quit, I drew strength from this belief. You, too, must believe that your miracle will happen.

I’ve decided today that I don’t want my YEAR of JUBILEE to end….and so today, on my birthday, I am declaring ANOTHER year of God’s Favor.  In fact….how about a DECADE or a lifetime???  I am going to greet each day with the same expectation that I did each day of my 50^th year….with the mind-set that I am blessed with God’s favor…and that He has equipped me with all I need to do all I need to do….and that He is in control of my life….my eating, my body, my thoughts, but I must surrender them to Him each day.  Today…and tomorrow….and next week….I am going to continually look for and expect the blessings that have been promised to us. It’s a mind-set….that is the key….to our journey.  

So, my friends….as my birthday gift, I am asking God for a year of favor for ALL OF US….. a year of great joy; a year of victory and strength; a year when we will be set free from all that holds us back; a year when we will be renewed and refreshed, and mostly, a year when we will BELIEVE, like me, THAT WE CAN…and WE WILL….CHANGE OUR LIFE!!!!!    Tell yourself this each day….in much the same way as I will tell myself….and express gratitude….. that I AM ABUNDANTLY BLESSED with God’s favor, not just for a year, but for a lifetime!

Negative thoughts are like weeds...they pop up everywhere!

I am very blessed to have so many people in my life who care about and support me in my journey. Most would say that I have a positive attitude and can often find good in tough situations. One, ironically the person closest to me, tells me frequently, however, that I am often“negative.” This, of course, really irks me because I think it’s more a situation where this person doesn’t really understand and share my thought process, emotional make-up, drive, passion, faith…etc….than it is that I am a “negative” thinker.  In addition, because I am a first-born child and my father died when I was a little girl, I had a lot of responsibility while growing up and much was expected from me at a young age. As a result, I am very independent and always have a “back-up plan” just in case. Conversations such as, “If this happens, I will do this…..and worst case scenario, blah blah blah…….” After all, I need to take care of myself, right?   I readily admit that I am a complex, emotional person, but I think it’s more of a situation that this person “just doesn’t GET ME” than the fact that I am a negative person; although, I admit that I am pretty hard on myself sometimes….and I always think I could have done better; been nicer; tried harder…and so forth.

With that being said, however, this morning was a perfect example of how I almost let negative thinking ruin my day. I have a big photo shoot coming up next week for another magazine feature story. This one is for a popular women’s magazine called FIRST.  The magazine is hiring a photographer, hair, makeup, and a wardrobe consultant, and sending this crew to do a four-hour shoot.  I suppose because they are sending this crew I feel a bit more apprehensive, especially because I’ve not been feeling overly confident about my body this summer because my body weight is shifting around, the excess skin is becoming more of an issue, likely due to age, gravity, and the fact that I have been unable to ride the bike and walk as much this summer because of the RA flares and issues that have been causing some distress. I’m also going to wedding this weekend out of town with a long-time, very dear friend (very excited!).  For the past few days, I’ve been trying to choose outfits for the photo shoot and a dress for the wedding and I’ve been way too hard on myself and have likely been a bit “negative” in my thinking about myself. This morning I tried on 7 different dresses….and a whole lot more over the weekend, and I STILL don’t know what I’m going to wear to either event. Wow, has life changed! A few years ago when invited to a wedding I would have two choices…either the black “tent-like dress” or the other black “tent-like dress!” Now I’m having to choose between the 30+ dresses (almost all bought at a thrift store, garage sale, or EBay) that I have hanging in the closet. Am I blessed or what???? J As I tried them on one by one, I found fault with each of them although I know that there is absolutely nothing wrong with any of them. I was just being overly critical of myself. I recognized this after about a half-hour and a pile of clothes on the bedroom floor and decided to put the wardrobe choices off until tonight or tomorrow. Such problems…eh?  Even I think it sounds ridiculous as I type it.

Ironically, all weekend I have been thinking a great deal about negative thoughts….not necessarily just my own…but in general. They are just like weeds; they grow easier than flowers or plants and can pop up out of no-where. They need constant attention to remove them or they will very easily take over your life/garden.  Sometimes they even come disguised as flowers/friends when they sport a blossom, but in reality, they are threats to the garden….robbing the desirable things of nutrients/energy. Just like a weed, it’s often much easier to harbor negative thoughts/emotions than positive ones….but if left untended, they will eventually take over completely and choke out the joy, peace, love, and sense of well-being that we work so hard to cultivate and grow.

No matter how hard we try to be positive all the time, all of us likely have days when negative thoughts creep in. Sometimes those thoughts are completely unfounded, but rear their ugly head, especially when we are tired, stressed, hormonal, or just not feeling well.  Sometimes they are brought on by others in our life who “push our buttons” or somehow rattle our cage. No matter what brings them on, negative thoughts can sabotage a person’s journey quicker than a Big Mac and fries! I may even go so far as to say that ‘negative thinking” and “negative people” are the biggest threat to my well-being and peace of mind…..likely because I am an emotional eater and when I allow negativity to take root, I want to eat.  Somehow I think that a protein bar will make me less irritated and/or feel better….but it doesn’t…..and then I feel bad about eating when I’m not hungry….and so I eat a piece of fruit to make me feel better….and then I think… “Gosh, Theresa, why did you do that?” and then I feel bad….and…..so it goes.  I’m guessing that there are A LOT of you reading this that are saying, “Oh my…THAT’s ME!”  Am I right?  J

SO…..I know the cycle….and I have to fight against it every day.  We all encounter negativity and often we have no choice. We don’t typically have any control over our co-workers who are constantly complaining about the company or the boss. We can’t do much about that in-law or relative that is continually belittling someone in the family or being crabby about everything. We can’t always make people like us, respect us, agree with us, etc…  Sometimes we have NO CHOICE about those around us….we need to work….we’re obligated to attend a family function, etc.  In those situations, we simply have to do our best to control our reactions to these individuals and situations. 

There are situations, however, when we can CHOOSE to avoid negative people by making changes in our life. Sometimes this means that we need to limit our time with those that continually threaten to drag us down. This is especially true in those situations where our “old friends” are still practicing habits that we are trying to change.  A recovering alcoholic likely won’t want to continue to go to the bars on the weekends and hang with the “drinking crowd.” A person trying to practice gratitude won’t likely want to spend a lot of time surrounded by those that are continually finding fault with EVERYTHING from the weather to the sports team, and complaining about everything and everyone. Rather, we need to find people who are like-minded….encouraging….uplifting; those that want us to succeed and continually support us, especially when we are feeling discouraged or down.  That’s why I love this group and why I am so grateful to have people around me that are like-minded and working to change their own life….or at least encourage/support/affirm me on mine.

In a conversation this weekend, I was telling a new friend about wardrobe dilemma and complaining that “this dress made me look hippy” and “ I felt fat in that one” and…….so forth.  He said something to me that really brought things into perspective.  He said something like this….. “Theresa, you know…for so many years you sat in a corner and couldn’t even participate in life….and now, listen to you….BEING NORMAL…..Almost all women your age have these same thoughts….complaining about their bodies….not being happy about their hips…..their thighs…etc… Look at you…. you are a typical woman and for the first time….you get to participate in those conversations. Isn’t that great?”   You know what….he is absolutely right!  I’m guessing that if I asked the group….or a group of my co-workers….how many of them are happy with their bodies….I’ll likely not find many.  His perspective helped turned an agitated mood into a good one…one of gratitude for SO MANY THINGS.

So, my friends….today…I encourage you to join me in choosing to be positive. You may have to dig deep to find the good in the situation….you may be hanging on by a thread….but I’m guessing, that if you are like me and feeling a bit ‘out of sorts” today or in the future, you will soon discover that if you take a little break and look at the situation you’ll see that things are not as bad as they seem.  Take a walk….pull some weeds….call a friend….clean out a drawer….read a book….do  WHATEVER you need to do to avoid eating/drinking/smoking/saying/spending something that you will later regret.  Let’s make this a great day….by choosing to be positive and grateful …..even if you are feeling a bit “hippy” like me! J