Just say NO!

Happy Lunch time!  I'm feeling a bit under the weather today but wanted to take a few minutes and check in and wish you all a great afternoon. A coworker just walked by with a big bag of chocolate and stopped and asked the people in the area if we wanted some.  What do you think I said?   You guessed it, I hope... I SAID....Thanks, but NO!!!!!  Yes, at this point in the game I could have said, sure, I deserve a treat, but I'm not going to! She said,  "I'm so sorry that I asked you, I didn't mean to tempt you" to which I replied, "Oh, you didn't tempt me, I could eat chocolate if I choose to, but I choose NOT TO....and besides, you just gave me an opportunity to prove to myself how strong my conviction really is."  I encourage you....at lunch time and the rest of the day... JUST SAY NO!  Come on, you can do it!  Yes, you COULD eat 'just a bite" or "just a taste" or "just a little bit".....BUT YOU ARE STRONG.... choose NOT TO!    Have a good day everyone...I'm off to eat my yogurt and a pear.

I am a creature of habit.

We are creatures of habit; well, at least I am.  I wake up at the same time (ridiculously early) every day, even on the weekend; I eat the same thing for breakfast (oatmeal) every day; I sit in the same seat at church each week; Purchase pretty much the same grocery list every week; I arrive to work at about the same time each morning (usually 45 minutes to an hour early),  and usually follow the same routine day after day. In some ways routines can be a good thing, especially if they incorporate good, healthy habits. In other ways, they can cause us to be in a rut, stunt our spiritual, mental, and/or emotional growth, or prevent us from experiencing new things, meeting new people, or changing our lives for the better.

Sometimes, though, any little alteration to our routine can “throw us off our game”; at least it does for me from time to time. This morning I woke up and discovered that the cable TV was out of service and my whole routine was off-kilter. I am not a big TV watcher but I turn the news on every morning and for 3 hours, the news is the background ‘noise’ while I do other things. I even know that it’s time to get in the shower when the local sports comes on and the daily trivia question means I better be ready to leave! This morning I was all ‘out of sync” when all I saw was the dreaded BLUE SCREEN and all I heard was the ticking of the clock for several hours.  Yes, I am a “work in progress”…..SIGH.

It’s ironic in a sense that this group is named “WE CAN CHANGE OUR LIVES” because in all honesty, I really struggle with CHANGE. Obviously, my life has changed dramatically, but I still am a creature of habit and I still resist change in many areas of my life. I have lived in four different homes in my adult life and after the initial move-in, I never rearranged the furniture in any of them. It makes me anxious when plans get changed or family traditions for the holidays get altered. I sometimes have difficulty adjusting to the many changes that are inevitable in my job. This kind of thinking hinders me in many ways and really contributed to the destructive/unhealthy behavior, ultimately almost destroying my life. Because I couldn’t adjust to the changes in my life after a job loss, a move away from home, the death of loved ones, a health crisis, and a return to college, I turned to food and isolated myself from others. You know the story by now. My inability to deal with the changes that are inevitable in life nearly cost me my own.  Perhaps you have been thrust into some life changes yourself that you felt like you had no control over….maybe an empty nest or a break-up in a relationship/marriage; perhaps a serious illness or loss of loved one; maybe you lost your job or your home or some other situation or crisis occurred.  How have you handled it? I hope better than I did.

When I realized that I was at ‘rock-bottom’….400+ pounds, unable to walk, unable to stand up long enough to brush my teeth, unable to take care of my basic needs, almost to the point of needing Assisting Living housing, I knew that I HAD BETTER MAKE SOME CHANGES……and soon. Some changes were easier than others. It was rather painless to substitute artificial sweeteners for sugar, to switch to 35 calorie bread instead of regular white, to drink diet soda or flavored water instead of Faygo. Others were a bit more difficult….rice cakes instead of chips???? Are you serious?  Fat free vinaigrette instead of Blue cheese salad dressing? You’ve got to be kidding!  Grilled chicken instead of a Big Mac? Yikes!  Making these changes were tough at first, but after a while, they became “habit” instead of “sacrifice” and now, they are automatic and routine and part of my day-to-day life. Changing one’s eating habits is not easy, but even ‘little changes” can have a big impact and lead to weight loss.

 

 Perhaps you feel the same about exercise or physical activity.  Did you resist it at first…force yourself to walk or go to the gym…but now you actually “miss it” or feel sluggish if you don’t get some exercise?  Maybe it’s the same with saving money, going to church, making time for yourself, studying for a class, or even saying things “I’m sorry”, “I love you ”or “Thank You.”  Maybe you’ve made some little changes in your life….and although they took work and effort in the beginning, you now find that they are just a ‘way of life” and as a result, your overall well-being  is improved and you are happier than ever.

 

I’ve been really working on accepting change as part of life; in fact, in some ways, embracing it and seeking it out, and I’m discovering day-by-day that CHANGE is oftentimes VERY GOOD!  Earlier this week while working at the other campus, I took a ‘different” side street across town on my way to Meijer’s. I didn’t know where it would end up, but on the way I saw a mailbox that was just covered with what appeared to be hundreds of gorgeous blue Morning Glories. They have somehow escaped the early frost and  was just an absolutely beautiful sight. Made me smile all the way home!  Stopped to Meijer’s and found some Pumpkin Pie Spice Sugar Free coffee creamer….never knew it existed….never tried it…and honestly didn’t want to try it because I’ve used French Vanilla creamer in my coffee for as long as I can remember….But I did try it…and for the past 2 mornings, I’ve been delighted by an entirely new coffee experience. A few years ago I never would have even considered trying something new.  I also bought some weird looking fruit. It was specked and was with the plums and peaches. I’ve never seen anything like it before but I bought a few of them anyway…and WOW…they are awesome! I did some research and discovered it is called Pluot…a cross between a plum and an apricot. Low fat, low calorie and very sweet. A few years ago I would not have even purchased fresh fruit (my fruit came in a Hostess pie) let alone try some “strange” fruit.

 

In recent months, CHANGE has been an almost constant thing. I’ve met new people and made new friends (YOU), I have gone places (NYC, who would have thought?) and done things I never dreamed possible (seriously, ride a bike and a Harley and climb dune????). Next Wednesday, if I don’t ‘chicken out”, I’m going on a fly-fishing trip on the Pere Marquette river!  Change, although not always easy, can be very good.  I encourage you today….Try something new.  Get a new haircut. Wear a different color blouse/shirt. Make a new recipe.  Think a DIFFERENT thought. Take a new route home from work.  As I said yesterday… “If we always do….what we’ve always done……Then we’ll always get….what we’ve always got.”  Start today….make the changes that will help you CHANGE YOUR LIFE!!!!!  With a little luck…those positive changes will soon become habit and routine.

 

If you've always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got!  You're HERE....You have DECIDED that you want to Change Your Life....SO....Are you going to take that LEAP of faith and actually DO....something different....THINK something different....BELIEVE something different?   I hope so! Don't be afraid....JUMP off that safe, secure lily pad. YES, I know the water is scary, but you are not alone!....YES, I know the water is deep and you're not sure you can do it...BUT I'M SURE YOU CAN! YES, I know you might not know how to swim, but there are A LOT OF PEOPLE in this group who do and are here to help you.  Go ahead....JUMP and soon you will discover that being FREE is so much better than being confined to those "lily pads" of life!  YOU CAN DO IT!

 

 

What are YOU smiling about?  I’m sure at one time or another someone has asked you that question, implying that you “might be up to something” or you “know a secret”, or that you are in some sort of mischief.  Perhaps someone in a bad mood has asked you that question because they felt that you were “mocking him/her” or “not taking him/her serious” when being scolded, questioned, or punished. Maybe someone just didn’t LIKE that you were happy about something. Maybe you WERE smiling in a sarcastic way. It’s ironic how we smile for a number of reasons, not all of them necessarily good.

 

Today started out to be the “stereotypical” Monday kind of day with one thing after another attempting to annoy me. I must admit, it almost worked! It was cold, damp, and dark when I got up….for the 3^rd straight day…and things just didn’t ‘fall into place” this morning. My RA was flaring and my joints were aching, my hair went ‘flat” and was giving me fits, I got distracted and forgot my oatmeal in the microwave and it got cold, the cat threw up on the living room carpet,  and I changed clothes THREE times before settling on my outfit! Finally, I couldn’t find the belt for my trench coat and spent 10 minutes looking for it before leaving without it.  Geez! All of this extra chaos meant that I was late in leaving for work…and it’s a Mt. Pleasant day so I had a 45 minute drive.  By late…I meant that I arrived at work 10 minutes before starting time rather than the typical 45 minutes  early …. “Get a life, Theresa J !

On the drive in, I decided that I had two choices: either dwell on the morning and let it ruin the rest of my day….or….use the 45 minute ride to “turn things around” and find things to SMILE about today.  So….I began to think about the morning.  Yep, the joints were aching but they are feeling better now that I’ve taken my meds….Thank you God for modern medicineJ.  Yep, my oatmeal was lukewarm…but I ate it anyway and because I did so, I was able to resist the delicious looking pumpkin muffins that my co-worker brought in to share. Thank you God, for strength in times of temptation. J Yep, I couldn’t find my belt for the coat but I wore it anyway and I’m glad I did because I encountered rain on the way here and it kept me dry on the walk into the building. J Yes, I really did change my clothes 3 times this morning, but I had 2 different people tell me that they “like my outfit” today. Thank you, God, for positive reinforcement from others. J And….because I was running late…I actually discovered that it isn’t actually DARK on the drive when I “arrive to work at the scheduled time” and I had the opportunity to watch the night turn into day. Thank you, God for the blessings of each new day. J

 I guess I have A LOT of things to smile about these days, but ironically, only part of it has anything to do with my weight loss. It wasn’t always that way. A few years ago, when I weighed more than 400 pounds and was at ROCK BOTTOM, I didn’t have much to smile about at all. In reality, I had very little joy. Life was really tough and I was in an incredible amount of physical and emotional pain…and I turned to food and isolation to comfort me. At least when I was in my bed with a big glass of soda and a fresh bag of potato chips and M&M’s I was happy for a while. Or so I thought.

Aside from eating, I used to think that the “only way” I would ever be happy is if I just woke up and was suddenly thin and able to walk.  Sigh….if only it were that easy!  As you know, the process of changing one’s life IS NOT EASY. In fact, it’s downright difficult. There are moments when you just want to give up. There are moments of discouragement. There are moments of guilt and shame. Some days you might find very little to smile about, but IT IS SO WORTH it in the end, but one very important thing I learned along the way is this: Weight really has very little to do with HAPPINESS.  Yes, absolutely I am overjoyed to have this new life. Absolutely, I am thrilled to be able to walk and do things I never could. Absolutely, I am happier than I’ve ever been or imagined, but only part of it has to do with the physical transformation. The true JOY...the lasting JOY…the real SMILE on my face….comes from the transformation in my head and heart. It comes from “looking at things differently” and learning to recognize what is really important in life. It comes from allowing God to change the way you ‘think”…the way you “feel”…the way you “act” and from learning to recognize all the wonderful blessings in your life.  It comes from days like today…when I have a choice to be miserable….to let the ‘dumb” things ruin my day….or CHOOSE to find things to smile about.

Does this mean that words like diet, weight, change, health, sacrifice, exercise, control, well-being….you get the drift…no longer matter?  Does this mean that you shouldn’t care what the scale says and go ahead and eat that Big Mac for lunch?  Does this mean that you should lay on the couch and watch TV all afternoon instead of going for a walk?  NO! What it means is that “When you choose to see things differently…when you choose to seek the positive…when you choose to smile IN SPITE of the “stuff” going on in your world”, then you will WANT to make healthy changes…to take care of yourself…to make choices to improve your well-being….and YOU WILL BE HAPPIER….regardless of your current size, situation, or life circumstances.   It is not easy….but it is SO WORTH IT.

SO my friends…Help me…and each other out. Give us some things to smile about today.  What are YOU smiling about today?